five best. week 4. part 2 of 2.

my assignment this week was cursed...sorta.

i don't really believe in curses...

or bad luck...

or anything like that...
(but apparently, i believe in using dot, dot, dots any chance i get)

perhaps the "bad luck" wasn't mine...

but instead, the people i had lined up to take portraits of.

it seemed that everyone had some sort of emergency

(as in: refrigerator broken and had to meet repair guy...
car accident...sickness)

i didn't think my homework was ever going to be completed!!

in fact, i had to resort to using my lovely husband...

and man, am i thankful i didn't marry a homely dude!
if only everyone had such a handsome plan B.
we completed the pictures just in time to go out on a nice date
just the two of us
and catch some open mic action at "the locals".
here he is posing with his j45 which was originally
his grandfather's, passed down to his dad
and now owned by him.

i'm thankful that we have pretty cool grounds
at our apartment building.
i was able to stay home for both portrait projects
which was actually "good luck" considering the time crunch.

nine best. week 4. part 1 of 2.

so...misleading title because i have more than nine to share so i'm going to share all fifteen...

this week's assignment is to take portraits of two people.

the first person i took pictures of is my sister-in-law, lisa, who

is also pregnant with my nephew, lucas!!

yay, maternity pictures!!!

belly!!

baby!!

you know, all the good stuff!

without further adieu...

here they be!

i'm sure we'll be seeing more of both lisa and the little mister.

thanks for posing, lisa!
 and for allowing me to stare at my camera in bewilderment for however long necessary...
and mr. lucas, you were very well behaved...can't wait to meet you.

heaven.

life is different when you love people that live far from you.

...it's even worse when the people you love are in heaven...

...it's hard when it's your child.

BUT

heaven is crazy awesome...

and sometimes, i think about it and get super excited!

i'm happy my boy is there.

he's a champion...

he deserves the best

and he's experiencing that.

how neat that God has prepared a place for His children...

...for my child.

i'm thankful.

heaven is a reward

for something that involved no effort on my part...

because it's not hard to love someone Who loves me so much...

He died for me.

it's not hard to sacrifice for someone Who sacrificed the most.

He died for me.

it's easy to believe in Someone Who has always been present.

heaven is a reward...

that i get

for something HE did.

cool the way He does things like that for us.

yup, heaven is an awesome place.

i'll see HIM...

and i'll see him.

and that's why,

on the worst day of our lives....

we smiled.

nine best. week three.

honestly, i didn't love this week's photos...

the assignment was to explore
the urban environment or natural landscape

and take black and white photographs
portraying the feeling i get when i'm there.

i picked Highland Memorial Park.

at first glance,

this park just looks like a park...

a relaxing field...

the headstones are not raised

the headstones are part of the earth.

i was drawn to the idea of nature being disturbed

by a natural part of life.

my project became personal

as i used mostly the markers of my family members.

the feeling i really wanted to portray was a sense of

remembering

respect

hope

the idea of continuing to teach our children

 about those that have left us...that we still love.

the first picture is to represent a new loss...

it's a new grave with lose dirt, marked only by a tiny pot of flowers.

remembering my grandfather

here's my sister teaching her son about his great-grandfather.

i love the idea of family roots here.

i only wish that i had gotten his whole name in that first shot

since it would have more meaning with more information.

remembering my uncle

i really wanted to show respect to my uncle in these photos,

especially since the thought of him being gone is still new in a lot of ways.

i was working with a new lens and blurred the background out too much in the second picture,

 but the grass was so dead, it wouldn't provide much contrast anyways.

remembering zachary

mykenzie will always know about zachary.

there's never going to be a time when we sit down and tell her our story...

because she'll already know it.

i love these pictures and are of personal value to me.

critiquing though, i'm annoyed that i cut the "z" out in the first picture...and i over-exposed her foot...

but i still love it.

this picture represents old loss.

i couldn't help but wonder if this person had any survivors left to clean off their headstone.

they've been gone for a long time, and it's very likely

that there's no one left to separate the earth from the stone.

i know they are remembered regardless...

afterall, i was there.

this wasn't an easy project for me. it was a blazing, sunny day and i messed up a ton of pictures and didnt realize it until i arrived home. i'm learning the most from my mistakes so it seems to be part of the natural process for me.

i took lots of other pictures throughout the week exploring the urban environment, too.

and i liked many of those pictures more but had to decide on nine that followed the same theme.

hope you enjoyed.

stay tuned.

the best part.

"you don't know the real me"

"i feel like i don't even know you"

maybe these statements have been said to you before.

they seem to cut deep.

you thought you really knew someone, then that relationship all of a sudden seemed bruised.

or, you shared your heart countless times with no evidence of growth.

there is great hope found in my relationship with Jesus.

sweet hope.

and no matter what people say to me,

i know

that i know Him

and He knows me.

our relationship isn't based on heat of the moment emotions.

or hurt feelings.

or feelings at all.

i love Him

because He first loved me.

and His love for me is instinctual...

it's part of His nature.

i'm His.

so, if you're feeling sad today...

maybe you need to remember...

that God knew your parts before they existed.

He knows your name.

He's capturing every tear you shed.

He knows the number of hairs on your head.

He knows your every thought.
your every move.
your every desire.
He knows your needs...
your goals...
your plans...

He's there to share a cup of tea with.

lean on Him.

speak to Him.

run to Him.

He's your friend.

He's singing over you today...

a sweet melody...

cradling you in His arms...

His embrace of grace.

the best part of knowing Him
is the intensity with which He knows me.

nine best. week two.

as i mentioned last week,

my assignment for this week is to return to the same subject and take more pictures.

i feel like i'm doing what i normally do and put tons of pressure on myself to be the best...

when in reality, i'm in week two of an introduction class...

meaning, even at the end of the course,

i won't be taking pictures like this...

but maybe someday.

i'm learning to chill'ax and enjoy the learning process...

because afterall, i'm doing this for fun.

here we go...

His.

Sanctified Blood

pouring out

enveloping me with grace

filling in the cracks

of my broken heart

and my open mind

making me whole

making me His.

nine best. week one.

i'm taking an introductory photography class at RISD because i desired to take better pictures of mykenzie and my future babies and all of their cousins. it's important to document with pictures since i'm failing in the baby book department.

this week, i basically took a zillion blurry pictures. 

 the assignment was to use the manual setting only and play around with exposure controls.

  exposure controls???

yeah, my iphone doesn't have those so i'm starting at the very beginning of my photography knowledge. 

thankfully, i only had to pick nine of them to turn in as my "best". 

here they are!

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

number four is underexposed, but i just loved her little face so i included it.
plus, i NEEDED nine for my class and even with 300 pictures, there weren't many to choose from.
number nine is my favorite.
she looks like a little strawberry cupcake.

my next assignment is to go back to my subject and take more pictures using a different approach.
i'm so thankful i picked such a cute subject.

i've gone indy.

little girl has low standards...

and so it works out perfectly...

she doesn't care about songs that rhyme...

songs in key...

or even songs that make any sense at all.

she stares at me with those big eyes of hers

and thinks i'm the greatest thing in the world.

she hasn't told me that, but i can tell.

my songs usually go a little like this...

"go to sleep, take a nap

you'll feel better in an hour

sleep your poodiness away

and i'll give you a bottle when you wake up"

or (sung to the tune of "the wheels on the bus")

"the baby on the bus goes drool, drool, drool

drool, drool, drool

drool, drool, drool

the baby on the bus goes drool, drool, drool

all over mommy's shoulder"

see?? basically, it's the same thing as talking, but with a horrible melody as i desperately search for my next word...

the Wiggles have contacted me because they're impressed.

but really, i've never received such glowing reviews

as i have from baby girl.

she's the best thing ever.

and apparently, she feels the same about me.

hey look.

"i'm teething and forfeiting naps 'til further notice."

poor swollen gums making way for krikorian teeth. yikes.

fortunately, she gets baby teeth first.

mission possible.

nate plays guitar...

and with that comes the discovery of guitar picks in random locations of the loft.

starting january 1st, i began a confidential mission to confiscate...uhh...collect guitar picks

 that met the following criteria:

1. it had to be found somewhere other than on top of his amp, guitar stand or any other equipment.

2. it had to be in that location for at least 24 hours.

you have no idea how often i find picks just abandoned on the floor

or dizzy from a spin in the dryer.

i was fed up!
 and although this mission made me laugh,
 it was initially a rather mischevious plan to punish nate in some way.
i wondered if nate had noticed them missing. he didn't appear to.

last week, i couldn't keep it a secret anymore. i finally told him of the secret jar

of orphaned guitar picks hidden under my bed...

total count: 29 in just under 6 weeks time. that's an average of 4.8 found each week.

 just sayin'...

he cracked up and pleaded for his favorite red ones, but i wouldn't budge.

(if anyone else is confused about the motive of my mission, you're not alone.

 it's four parts:

1. to punish

2. to rescue
3. to make a point.
4. to hold hostage?)

today, i decided to use my power for the good and give these guitar picks new life with a simple (emphasis on simple) project...

the guitar picks are no longer abandoned orphans, but joyful, rounded, triangular pieces of plastic happily residing in our frame collage above our bed...

i think they're happy.

i am.

i think nate secretly likes it, too.

in a funny way, i feel like they represent how i feel there should be a place for everything...

unfortunately, it's also a reminder to me that nate doesn't agree. sigh.

( in case you care:

these frames have been above our bed for almost 2 years and i still have 4 frames to fill so don't look too close!

the other frames are filled with

a picture of mykenzie,

a picture of the three of us,

a picture of nate playing guitar {all of these are in my sidebar and taken by our friend, Pasha},

a maternity picture of me holding an "M" taken by our friend, Matt at Blueflash,

an image of a "Z",

zachary's footprints (which a nurse misspelled "november" on...grrr...)

mykenzie's footprints at 4 months old,

and a printed art that i bought off of etsy that says "our love rocks" with an acoustic guitar head that has hearts instead of tuning knobs  (that's where i got my blog name from!)