Something bigger

For pretty much my entire adult life, I've felt the desire to be part of something bigger than myself....something that only God is capable of doing....and when I see Mykenzie's ultrasounds, I realize I am.



How can people not believe in God, when having children makes Him so very real??

She shines like the sun

I never formally introduced my beautiful niece, Soleil Mariela!!! We love her!!!



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time is yummy

while i was in the hospital with zachary, they kept saying that every day he stayed inside was "icing on the cake"...and well, i'm 25 weeks today...so i feel like that's some substantial icing! and i don't even like icing, but this seems delicious in a non-edible sort of way!

{did you notice how i switched the saying from "time is money" to "time is yummy" because of the reference to icing??...did you get that?? ugh, i crack myself up a little too much, i guess}

a letter

dear sweet baby girl,

you are curled safely inside my body, completely unaware of the milestone that we've reached today...your journey with us started 24 weeks, 4 days ago which is exactly one day longer than i've ever been pregnant. i'm so happy to share this with you, my girl.

i couldn't sleep last night...

i felt so free to dream and plan for you...

we will have such a fun life together.

i keep picturing you in there...because of your big brother, i know what your skin feels like...i know it's soft...i know it's still a bit translucent...i know your eyes are sealed shut, but underneath those tiny lids, you have the darkest pupils with almost no whites to be seen yet. i can feel you move and know that your movements are slower and more gentle than they actually feel. i know you are perfect.

i could smile all day thinking of you....and sometimes, i do.

i hope you feel how much your daddy and i love you, baby. we always will.

we waited a long time for you and feel so grateful for each day we've had with you already.

i've been missing your brother a lot lately...i so wish he could have been here for all of this. i can't wait to tell you all about him...and through all my stories, i hope that i can clarify some things that can be confusing about God. Sweet Baby, His plans are mysterious but not to be feared....His plan for you is far more amazing than we can imagine...Grandpa has always said that "life is an adventure"...it truly is! and sometimes the adventure isn't always fun and can sometimes be scary, but as long as you're in His Will...you'll be ok. Mommy isn't a risk taker...but if i can teach you anything, it would be to risk it ALL for Him.

Mykenzie, we love you with all our hearts...we were never scared to love you too much.

You've had all of us from the beginning.